She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize