Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
