i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
