He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
