My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize