i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
