WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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