i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize