Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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