Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
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