Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
