Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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