She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
