and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize