Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
