I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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