It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
