Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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