Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Randomize
