Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize