i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I party with great urgency now.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
