oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
