Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize