I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
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