i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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