you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
