Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize