Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize