we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
She bit a glass in half.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
