Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
