i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
BRING THE BAGELS
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
