just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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