Got a toothbrush?
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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