she looked like the before picture.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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