i may or may not be watching the land before time
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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