I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
