I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I think my nap took me to another dimension
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Randomize