im gay
i know
yea but for you.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
