You're completely useless in the revolution.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
