so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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