i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
