The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
When did angry sex become our thing?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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