come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize
