i need an iv and a liver transplant
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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