This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize
