i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
