I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
