so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Randomize
