For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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