There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
