...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I feel like a drive thru vagina
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Randomize
